Watching Pornography – a Harmless Pastime?

Is pornography a harmless activity? A “No harm, no foul” situation?

Nina Bullock from Fight the New Drug has emphatic answers. Her answers are, “No!” and “No!” 

The “new drug” that her organization is fighting is pornography. It resembles a street drug in that it requires a continuously increasing dose to produce a thrill. It can also ruin lives.

How Pornography Messes up Lives

Let’s join Bullock in taking a look at a composite case, Joey Adams. Eighteen now, Joey started going to porn sites when he was 12 years old. He didn’t go looking for a porn site, but one day during web surfing, he saw an attractive female picture.

Curious, he clicked the link, and suddenly this 12-year-old was looking at the most exciting woman he had ever imagined.

It gave him a nice dopamine hit. He felt great!

But after a few days of looking at her, he wanted more. And bam! The more he saw, the more he wanted. At first, watching kissing was exciting, but over time, to get the excitement and the turn-on he now craved, he was searching for hard core sex acts.

But soon even that wasn’t enough. There had to be some violence in it to get him turned on. It had to be rape. And then brutal rape. And then beatings along with the sex.  

By the time he was in his mid-teens, even those images didn’t do it for him.  By age 18, he needed to watch ATMs. And no, we’re not talking about automatic teller machines. (Look it up under ATM sex.). (Although skip looking it up if you have a weak stomach. It’s horrible, and yet common.)

Adam Was Addicted

Adams needed to spend a couple of hours a day getting his porn fix. He had a serious addiction problem.

As Bullock points out, there were negative effects to what Adams was doing. For one thing, his addiction was affecting his brain. His brain was becoming desensitized and it took ever greater amounts of his pornography “drug” to give him the high that he craved. 

This also affected his heart. He could be in the presence of a real girl and feel nothing.  Between his tendencies to isolation and a sense of shame, his social life became non-existent.

Another consequence was one that involved society as a whole. Adams was unintentionally helping make possible a whole ecosystem of exploitation, whether women or men, or for that matter, boys or girls. 

“People may try to tell you this is harmless,” says Bullock, “but it’s not harmless. In 9 countries, 49% of sexually exploited women said that pornography was made of them during the time they were being sold for sex. For more on this come to: https://fightthenewdrug.org/by-the-numbers-porn-sex-trafficking-connected/

An Ultimate Scam

As Bullock points out, “There was an institute that claimed to be a sex positive production company, but we later learned that the star of these films was being trafficked.   

“One female survivor’s captor slept on top of her at night so she wouldn’t escape, watched her through a hole when she went to the bathroom, and listened to her phone calls with a gun pointed at her head. She was forced to appear in a video that made the Sinclair Intimacy Institute’s list of ‘sex positive productions!’”  

The victim reported, “Every time someone watches that film, they are watching me being raped.” 

What Parents Can Do

Don’t have “the sex talk” just once. Have it over and over again. – For age-appropriate language, visit: https://fightthenewdrug.org/the-guideline-how-to-talk-to-your-kids-about-porn/

You have a right to prevent your child from viewing pornography. It’s a right just as much as you have a right to keep your child from any dangerous drug.

What an Addicted Person Can Do

 

What about the individual who is already addicted and wants to get back a normal life, one where he (and sometimes she) feels normal arousal related to real human beings?  For recovery-related resources, Bullock recommends: https://joinfortify.com/ftnd  

For more information on pornography addiction, go to https://fightthenewdrug.org.  

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Mitzi Perdue is a business owner, speaker. and author of the books, HOW TO MAKE YOUR FAMILY BUSINESS LAST, and 52 TIPS FOR PREVENTING HUMAN TRAFFICKING. Contact her at Mitzi@MitziPerdue.com or call her at 410 860-4444.